-- Umm, Yes, I Have a Bit Too Much Time On My Hands --

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I’ve been perusing some old posts that I don’t even remember writing (…I’m gettin’ old), and may do some updates of them, starting with this one:

9 Things NOT likely to happen in 2024… and one that might :

1. Sacha Baron Cohen releases his latest film entitled "Borat Wanders the American Southern Swampland In Search of that Very Most Elusive Ivory-beaked Woodpecker, For the Benefit of Mankind."

2. Steve Latta claims again to see an Ivory-bill in Louisiana but nobody believes him, when the bird in his only photograph appears to be an Imperial.

3. In a remarkable coincidence, David Sibley and John Fitzpatrick compete against one another in a new season of “Dancing With the Stars.”

4. The great great grandson of Mason Spencer walks into Van Remsen's LSU office one Friday afternoon and plunks down a freshly-shot Ivory-bill, inquiring, "So is this the dang thing you fellas been lookin' fer???"

5. Matt Courtman receives $1.5 million from George Soros’s Foundation to search for the IBWO (...and boy, is the National Aviary pissed!).

6. Donald Trump shoots an illegal immigrant on 5th Avenue, insuring a landslide victory in the Presidential election.

7. Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and Mark Zuckerberg finally announce that they will henceforth rule the world as a triumvirate, and the rest of us should just STFU.

8. Peace on Earth

9. Jennifer Aniston marries Cyberthrush.

10. Photographs taken at a nesthole in Louisiana show 2 large black-and-white woodpeckers that everyone agrees are NOT Pileateds!

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